I am in a crazy stage of transition in my life.
In March I'll hang up my personal training hat. I'll be working full time on my online coaching business through Beachbody and I'll be launching my prenatal fitness series and online support system. Oh and I forgot one small little thing & the biggest reason for this transition...I'll be a new mom. ;)
Every single aspect of this transition excites me! I can't wait to hold our baby boy for the first time and I can't wait for that first morning where I'm all alone with him and I'm thinking "What the hell did I get myself into!!!" I'm excited for ALL of it. I should also note that I'm equal parts terrified :)
But leading up to this massive change in my life and career I am experiencing a lot of doubts, fears and insecurities. These are the same doubts that have plagued me all my life that love to creep right in when things aren't clicking. Career wise, up until this point my online business has been a natural extension of my existing training business. I've know how to talk about it and share my skill set. Now that's going away...and with that goes a huge chunk of my identity. For the last 7 years, all I have been doing is training. I have worked with teenagers, elderly and every age in between. I've worked with men and women. I've done group classes and private training...I've worked with EVERYONE. And now that all changes.
My focus has shifted to working with women only and a big focus on those who are pregnant and those who are juggling leading a healthy life and having children. My focus has shifted because my LIFE has shifted. But now how I talk about my changing business and what I do feels clunky and foreign. My confidence in my abilities isn't where it was and I'm left with a ball of anxiety in my throat. Oh and life wise...well I've never been a mom before so with that comes a whole different list of doubts, fears and anxieties! ha!
As a result of these massive shifts I've been experiencing the "keep me up at night" questions.
- Am I good enough to ACTUALLY help these women like they need?
- Who will listen to me? I'm only a first time mom with no experience!?
- Will I be able to make this business work and financially contribute to my family?
- Am I going to fail?
- What will people think?
- Can I really create the life I've always imagined for myself? Or am I just delusional?
- What the hell am I doing with my life?
- Am I truly capable of pulling this off with a newborn?
After several nights (and days) hanging out with these "keep me up at night" questions, I have learned that with transition comes choice.
I can choose to let my mind be clouded and filled with doubt and allow these doubts to further delay my dreams. Or I can choose to change the paradigm in my mind and take action towards my future vision.
I can choose to have the courage to be authentically messy through this transition and fall down 100 times but get up 101. I can have the courage to change my story and create my dream ending. I'm going to do a better job of showing you ME through this transition. The bumps the bruises as well as the victories and successes. Because balance is finding joy in the highs AND the lows.
The one thing I do know is that doing this alone isn't an option. Not for me and hopefully not for you. My dream is to work with women and support women who have these same "keep me up at night" questions. Where we can work together, grow together and support each other through every transitional moment of career and motherhood. I understand that this is just the BEGINNING of the transitions ahead of me. You might be right there with me or you're already in the throws of motherhood. Either way, I want to do this together.
I'm going to show up every day during this transition and share the balance. I don't know what I'll face but I do know I have a choice in how I handle it and how I grow with it. I'd love to have you join me on this journey! Let's have the courage to change our stories, together.