Focus on the destination not the difficulty!

There are some quotes that just stick with me!  A quote can literally motivate me to get up and workout, start a new business, take a road trip, and look fear in the face and keep going! I believe that words can create action and when we take action we are truly living the life we were meant to live! 

I just finished reading Grant Cardone’s latest book called The 10x Rule and while it’s incredibly intense, he makes a lot of really important points.  A lot of what he says smacks you across the face and is pretty harsh, but one of these harsh realities he shared was simply too perfect not to expand on! He said, “Focus on the destination not the difficultly.”  

Think about that for a second. So many of us go through life making excuses about why we aren’t doing what we want to do because of the perceived  difficulty we will face.  What we are saying to ourselves is that our dreams, goals, and the vision we have for our lives are not important enough to fight through the difficult times.  Do we want to get to the end of our lives with this regret?  I certainly don’t! 

What’s the alternative? The alternative is to dig in and go for it!  If it scares you then you must be doing something right!  Imagine if you lived your life with blinders on just trudging on towards your goals!  Imagine if you knew your goals and dreams were so important you would stop at nothing to attain them.  Wrap yourself in the feeling you’ll have when you reach these goals!  We are all put on this planet to do something amazing!  What is your amazing?  

Don’t wait another moment. Write down your dream life, your goals, the vision you have for your life!  Read it over and over every single day as you keep pushing towards this goal!  And stop at nothing to reach them because you deserve to live that incredible life!    

Where did the day go??

We’ve all had those days.  You hit the snooze a few too many times, you get caught up in a meeting, your to do list seems to be hijacked by everyone else’s needs and when you finally get a second to breathe your day is almost over and nothing that YOU wanted to do has been done.  So what do you do? 

More often than not it seems like our first reaction is stress then frustration and then we give up on the day entirely.  I’d like to offer 3 quick things that might be able to change your mood and make you feel like the day wasn’t a complete wash!  

1) Sit down and breathe for 5-10 minutes.  Close your eyes and start counting your breaths.  Inhale, 1, exhale, 2, inhale 3, exhale 4….repeat this up to the number 10 and then go back to 1 and repeat.  This simple calming exercise can get your mind clear and sanity back in place.

2) Go for a walk or get some exercise.  I promise you you’ll feel better about your day once you get a workout in.  The endorphins you get from the workout will boost your mood and will make your mind more productive.  

3) Look at your to do list and knock out 2 of the nagging tasks.  They can be as small as laundry or as big as a video for your website.  Make sure you give 2 attention tonight.  You will then be able to rest your head knowing you moved your mission forward today!

Now lets go reclaim our day!  

What is our body saying?

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I was sitting in the lobby at my dog’s vet this morning just wishing she could tell me what was wrong with her.  The guessing game kills me!  I just want her to feel healthy and be her normal spunky self!

All this got me thinking…we go years and years without listening to our bodies.   What do I mean by that? Well, we suffer through annoyances that we’re feeing and we don’t listen to what our bodies are trying to tell us.  Here are some common warning cries that are bodies are sending us and what might be the root cause. 

Inflammation:  Inflammation is our bodies natural reaction when trying to heal itself but with many of the foods we eat that inflammation never goes down which leads to obesity and several other chronic diseases.   SUGAR is the biggest culprit here. By eliminating processed foods of all kinds you will immediately feel the relief.  Take it up a notch by eating more fresh vegetables and fruits, lean proteins and ramp up the Omega-3s!

Bloating: Belly bloat is so annoying and uncomfortable in more ways than one. While there are several issues like IBS and Crohn’s that cause bloating, food is absolutely a massive contributor.  Bloating is a sign that our bodies aren’t digesting properly.  I always say if our bodies do not recognize the food it will simply store it as fat instead of use it as fuel.  So when we’re eating processed foods, large quantities of cheese or dairy, refined carbohydrates and on top of that not drinking enough water our bellies will get distended and we’ll feel that icky bloat for a while.  On top of that the more fat cells we have the slower our bodies can get rid of whats in our belly.

Restless Sleep: When you’re having a restless night and wake up feeling more tired than when you went to bed your body is telling you something!  You might be dealing with acid reflux that is waking you up throughout the night.  Some of the main causes of acid reflux are fried foods, soda, sweets, high fat dairy and meats, caffeine, and alcohol.  Alcohol is another reason we sleep poorly.  Even though it seems like it puts us to sleep it actually effects our rhythm.  

Acne/Skin issues:  Acne isn’t just about oily skin and puberty. Acne has a lot to do with our diets.  Food sensitives and allergies can lead to blemishes as well as dark spots, puffy eyes and rashes.  Do a gut check and clock how much sugar you’re ingesting.  The bacteria in your system can be completely bent out of shape and unable to do their job with too much sugar.  Looks like cutting processed foods and sugars from your diet wins again. 

Moodiness: Did you know that our mood is determined by what we put in our bodies? I love the saying, “good food, good mood.”  Sugar, caffeine, alcohol, excessive carbohydrates and processed foods are a direct result in our stress and sluggish moods.  

There are a lot of signs and signals our bodies are sending us day and night. Let’s do our bodies a favor and listen!  

"What if we simply pretended that our words and promises would be on the front page of the newspaper tomorrow? "

Oh my gosh can you imagine if this happened?  When I read this it made me think of Carrie Bradshaw and her “SSB” - Secret Single Behavior!  She didn’t want anyone to know how she stacked saltine crackers with grape jelly in her kitchen!  haha!

This quote by Brendon Burchard in The Charge got me thinking even further than words and promises.  What if our ACTIONS were on the cover of the newspaper?  What if our actions were taped daily like a reality TV show?  Would this change what you do, say, act and interact?  What if how you cut someone off in traffic, snubbed someone on the street, made fun of someone’s clothing, judged someone for their weight…the list goes on and on.  But what if you had to be confronted with your actions.  

This tiny question is truly a call to action.  Let’s make our headline shine! Let’s have the front page of the newspaper be about love, compassion, and kindness!  Let’s make our daily actions so thoughtful that we would be proud to see our cover story published!  

You might be thinking, “What is comparison complex.” Comparison Complex is when we essentially rate ourselves against another person.  And 99.99% of the time we rate ourselves “less than” the other person.  

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“The second our internal competence scale tips from self-assured to self-doubting is the moment we begin feeling defeat.  We start questioning our ability, intelligence, strengths – our entire future.  When we feel inadequate, uncomfortable feelings such as anxiety, anger, disappointment, hopelessness, and fear of failure become the norm.  The net effect of feeling incompetent is disastrous: we stop trying, learning, growing, and contributing.  We start compulsively comparing ourselves to others, and we feel we don’t measure up.  Our charge in life can feel lost altogether because progress feel daunting, if not impossible.”  - Brendon Burchard 

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When I read that section a few months ago in The Charge by Brendon Burchard I thought, “Oh my gosh that is 100% me….Still.” I couldn’t believe that this was still me!?!  I have recovered from Anorexia - that’s behind me!!  I eat healthy and help people all day long feel better about their bodies!  How could this still be me?!  

I realized that I shifted from comparing my body to other peoples’ bodies to comparing areas of my life to others.  So that anxiety, feelings of incompetence, not measuring up were still all there because of my comparison complex.  I know I’m not alone here.  Does this sound like you?  Now that I’m awake and aware I see this happening all over the place.  And now with the power of social media we’re comparing ourselves to people we don’t even know!  We’re comparing ourselves to celebrities, public figures, people on Instagram, etc.  We’re comparing without knowing a single thing about what’s happening on the other side of the posted picture.  Many of us who struggled with an eating disorder or body dysmorphia in the past have never fully gotten over it.  And while we are eating better and working out in a kinder fashion we’re still in the comparison complex cycle.  As we’ve moved out of that phase we’ve imprinted the same behavior onto other areas of our lives. 

So what do we do? 

My answer isn’t a quick fix.  Just like weight loss, it is a total journey with daily consistent actions towards leading a healthier life.  But there are definite steps we can take each day to lift ourselves out of this mental and emotional block. 

From my experience I have learned there are three things we must do daily to reverse this mindset. 

First - We need to approach our lives and each day with a grateful heart.  Instead of placing harsh criticisms on each moment we approach them with a gentle filter.  Instead of looking at each moment in judgment we approach them with an open and accepting attitude.  Instead of looking for reasons that it won’t work out, we start looking for ways we can thrive.  By shifting our frame of mind to that of being grateful we open up ourselves to a world of possibilities we’ve been suffocating.

Second - We need to compliment our physical form.  We need to look ourselves in the mirror at the start of every day and verbalize something that is truly remarkable about ourselves.  We all have unique qualities that make us spectacular. By recognizing these things daily we are more inclined to stand up and stand out as opposed to shrink into the background. 

Third - we must take ourselves out of the equation.  I know that sounds like the complete opposite of what I said above but when we have a goal, a vision, a dream, and make it about someone else then it becomes so much more powerful.  You decide to treat yourself with respect to be an example for your daughter; you step up and take charge of a project to make your parents proud; you lose 50 pounds to be around for your spouse when you’re older…. See what I’m saying? It becomes exponentially more powerful to treat yourself better for the benefit of the people we love. 

And remember - they love and adore you too.  Try to look at yourself through THEIR eyes and see your incredibly beautiful qualities!  You matter.  You are beautiful.  It’s time to show the world your value!