Yes, the weight difference here is noticeable but what matters most to me is the transformation in my CONFIDENCE between these 2 photos.
I opened up about my past with a friend the other day and she had NO idea I struggled with confidence. And that got me thinking you probably don’t know I struggled either. It’s not always easy to share but I know it helped her understand where I came from and why I want to help others feel there is light at the end.
Building confidence in people is such a HUGE part of what I do now so it seemed only fitting to share with you where I’ve come from.
So here it is…. (and I appreciate in advance for letting me open up to you because this still is not easy for me to share).
I struggled for 20 YEARS to accept my body. I dramatically restricted calories and worked out 4-6 hours daily.
I was a part of every club and every program so no one would see me eat (or not eat).
For 5 years my right hand had a permanent blue ink stain on it because I kept a running tally of my daily calories. I would smudge it out and write the new total after everything. Even gum.
I compared every aspect of myself to other people. It started with comparing bodies then moved to skills, opportunities, and successes as I got older.
I told myself every day I was never good enough, smart enough or skinny enough…..I even kept a journal to remind myself (just in case the internal monologue didn’t take care of it).
I always imagined a better life for myself. But whenever I was met with failure I threw in the towel because I thought it was a sign that I was meant to struggle and my dreams were just that… dreams.
Why do I share this with you? Not to make you feel sorry for me… but because I want you to know you’re not alone. I’ve been there! I know how you’re feeling and I know that it doesn’t have to be like that. Truly.
I share this with you because my page 1 is now so different from my page 100. So much of my health and fitness journey has been about overcoming these “truths” I created for myself. It sounds ironic but health and fitness actually SAVED me. Crazy to say that out loud…but it’s true.
Becoming a trainer got me part of the way there… but becoming a coach has made me who I am today.
I share this because I took a chance on my coach a year and a half ago. Even with all these thoughts running through my head, I decided to “try one more time…” I figured what was the harm in trying - if I fail, I’ll prove myself right again. But there was that dream that said, “What if I don’t fail?” If I didn’t take that leap of faith I know without a doubt in my mind a lot of this would still be going on.
I share this because I want MORE for you too. I don’t want you to be where I was anymore. My coach saw something in me that I didn’t. I see something in you that you don’t!
If this is you - just know I’m here. And if you’re thinking “what does she do?” or something here spoke to you and fired you up, please message me. I went through a lot and came out on the other side. I know that I went through it all so I could help others shorten their time dealing with this. That’s what I am here for.
Coaching changed my life and I want it to help impact yours. Simple as that. You see my transformation from a girl wrapped in fear to the confident woman I am today. That could be possible for you. Taking the leap of faith isn’t always easy…but I promise it is worth it! And I’ll be by your side through the whole thing.
Ps- Thanks again for letting me share this side that was hard in the moment but now has molded me into who I am today.