Summary of video:
Comparison complex can hit us at any stage in our lives. For me it started young with comparing my body to those around me. I focused on our thighs first and foremost. Where mine bigger or smaller? I viewed my self worth in relation to how my thighs compared to others around me.
After recovering from an eating disorder I realized my comparison shifted from body image to career status and advancement. Have you ever looked at someone in your office or same field who has reached a higher level and because of that you begin to feel small? Have you ever felt inferior because another person was dressed better, held themselves better or controlled the room better?
When we allow ourselves to compare, 9 times out of 10 you won’t be the victor. You will let the other person rise so big in your head you question whether or not what you’re doing is even valuable. You question if you should quit or give up. This comparison complex can be all consuming. It can limit your true potential and slow your growth in all areas of life.
There are two things that I want you to try to combat comparison complex. First, write down a list of everything you’ve accomplished, are proud of and feel like you did a really good job at. Write it down. I would wager that the list is pretty long and you’ve forgotten about some of the cool things you’ve done in your life. Now that you have that list, read it often. Think of it as your pep talk each day. The more you can see what you have accomplished and the more we can build your confidence the less you will feel the need to compare aspects of your life to others.
Second, think about all the ways you can elevate the person you are comparing yourself to. What strengths do you have that you can bring to the table and amplify that person? Changes are when you offer help and collaborate with that person they might just say “I couldn’t have done that without you!” Competition will only deepen your anxiety and need to compare yourself. Remove that but striving to elevate the other person.
Spend time rewriting your story. Stop playing small because of what you THINK others are thinking about you. Remember comparison is a manufactured story in your own mind. There really isn’t a gap between you and the person you’re comparing yourself to. That gap is without a doubt self imposed.
We do a very good job of pointing out our flaws and spend very little time acknowledging our strengths. It’s time to get to know yourself again. The REAL you! You bring so many skills and a unique perspective to every situation. If you take the time to list your strengths and accomplishment and spend quality time collaborating with and elevating those around you, I know that your insecurities will diminish. Your need to play small will fade and you can rise right along side those you once thought were out of your league. We need to see more of you in the world!
Until next time love big, live vibrantly and shine bright my friends!